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[tab title="Movie Review"]
First and foremost, director Rob Cohen's latest flick does NOT rock you like a hurricane. It might, in fact, do the opposite and put your ass to sleep. Somehow the director of The Fast and The Furious, Dragonheart, xXx, and Daylight inexplicably drains the mighty ferociousness from a category 5 hurricane with his latest (and goofiest) offering and Lionsgate, trying to squeeze out the last bit of change from this turd, go all out with it's blu-ray debut.
The Hurricane Heist is bad; real bad. In it, a well-armed team of mercenaries, who prefer to tranquilize instead of kill their targets, decide to use the eye of a hurricane for safe transport after cleaning out a local treasury facility along the Gulf Coast. With well-timed waves and high winds providing much of the logic-defying entertainment, this caper is strictly for the bankrupt.
The Hurricane Heist, having snuck in and out of theaters last March without ANY positive notes, is so bad, in fact, that I don’t dare suggest you even watch this one for the unintentionally funny dialogue and ridiculous scenes that our heroes face as they attempt to stop a poorly planned heist in very small town. Quite honestly, hurricanes deserve more respect than this.
Placing Twister inside a misguided attempt to recreate The Fast and the Furious (complete with a meteorologist’s tactical Batmobile-like tank he lovingly has named “The Dominator”), but with none of the star power, is a really dumb idea and makes for one awful shit-storm of a heist flick. When the vehicle is the star of the flick (and you aren't in Knight Rider or Airwolf, Street Hawk or, hell, Automan), you need to back up, reboot, and consider your priorities.
Football. Guns. Football again. If it weren’t for all the man-made climate change babble, director Rob Cohen’s worst movie yet might have been made explicitly for Trump’s new America. Hell, at the height of one climactic scene, one do-gooder starts hurling hubcaps like they were ninja stars and even buries one in a mercenary’s chest while the wind rages on. That’s right, the good guys strike first blood in this flick. Go, Team America!
While that scene is unintentionally comic, far too much of this piece of crap is wasted on a serious vibe that makes for one grueling (and long) flick. Of course, watching Maggie Grace and Tony Kebbell get sucked up into the hurricane, still attached to cables, might leave you laughing as they ridiculously dangle and twist in the high velocities thanks to some seriously wonky CGI. The scene is pretty funny in that so-bad-it’s-good sense and, as you can see by the rating, it is worthy of at least ONE BEER but the rest? No, no, and no.
IF you survive the 4-minute over the top CGI opening in which a hurricane flips a house over and kills the father of two young boys trapped inside, know that The Hurricane Heist won’t be the fun B-grade flick you want it to be. Nothing about this heist thriller is unique or exiting, save for the CG category 5 hurricane used as cover, and that’s a HUGE disappointment. Another is the transparency of this screenplay, written by Jeff Dixon and Scott Windhauser, as bad guys are easily identifiable and the heroes win by somehow knowing exactly what and when this otherwise unpredictable storm is going to do.
Starring Toby Kebbell as Will Rutledge and Ryan Kwanten as Breeze Rutledge as our grown-up brothers still living on the Gulf and Grace as Casey Corbyn, the Treasury agent with the only smarts to figure out what is happening as the edge of the hurricane makes landfall, The Hurricane Heist certainly isn’t going to blow you away with its acting talent. Grace, who is getting better the older she gets, probably makes it out of this one alright. Even Ralph Ineson underwhelms here.
Simply put, and this extends to the direction, too much of this rain-soaked flick winds up being a watery mess. Even the life-saving peanut butter sandwiches are soggy.
With nothing better to watch on a Saturday afternoon, put The Hurricane Heist on and take a nap. It will make for a much better flick.
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[tab title="Details"]
MPAA Rating: R.
Runtime: 103 mins
Director: Rob Cohen
Writer: Scott Windhauser, Jeff Dixon
Cast: Toby Kebbell, Maggie Grace, Ryan Kwanten
Genre: Action | Crime | Thriller
Tagline: On March 9, make it rain.
Memorable Movie Quote: "Well, I *am* a citizen of Alabama!"
Theatrical Distributor: Entertainment Studios Motion Pictures
Official Site: http://www.hurricaneheistmovie.com/
Release Date: March 9, 2018
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date: June 5, 2018
Synopsis: Thieves attempt a massive heist against the U.S. Treasury as a Category 5 hurricane approaches one of its Mint facilities.
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[tab title="Blu-ray Review"]
Blu-ray Details:
Home Video Distributor: Lionsgate
Available on Blu-ray - June 5, 2018
Screen Formats: 2.40:1
Subtitles: English SDH; Spanish
Audio: English: Dolby Atmos; English: Dolby TrueHD 7.1
Discs: Blu-ray Disc; Two-disc set (1 BD-50, 1 DVD); UV digital copy; iTunes digital copy; Digital copy; DVD copy
Region Encoding: Locked to Region A
Presented on Blu-ray courtesy of Lionsgate Films with an AVC encoded 1080p transfer in 2.39:1, The Hurricane Heist looks pretty good. Maybe too good. Those CGI effects – including the storm – look all sorts of gamey thanks to the details present on the screen. Scenes are not especially bursting with bright colors due to the continuous storm, but the transfer remains strong with the darker, softer night sequences – of which there are many – carrying the bulk of the transfer. Absolutely no flaws to report on this presentation. Meanwhile, the DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 track is almost always sturdy, with the booming soundtrack proving its most valuable asset. Despite that, dialogue is typically crisp with a couple of minor offenses, and there are only a few instances where the audio track feels like it’s pulling its punches a little bit.
Supplements:
Commentary:
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Cohen talks about the making of the movie on the commentary track. Are you surprised there is one? I am. Thankfully, he is engaging and has a lot of anecdotes. He’s been in the game for years and, love his flicks or hate them, he has history in Hollywood.
Special Features:
Lionsgate goes all out on this one. Not only do buyers get Cohen’s commentary, but they get a bevy of supplemental items about the flick. Weird. A really shitty flick gets some seriously strong featurettes. Imagine that! Buyers also get a slipcover, a Digital copy, and a DVD copy of a movie you are guaranteed to want to watch over and over and over again. Not.
- Eye of the Storm
- Hollywood Heist: A Conversation with Rob Cohen
- VFX Reel
- Deleted Scenes
- UV digital copy
- iTunes digital copy
- Digital copy
- DVD copy
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