Killer Kites (2023)

“Hold on. Don’t order lunch without me. I gotta call this woman and tell her that her brother is dead.”

OH. MY. GOD.  The Psycho of Z-grade flicks has arrived!

Killer Kites is EXACTLY the type of laser brained Z-grade horror flick the world needs right now.  Highly quotable and full of crazy characters, this film - which is currently streaming due to high demand from October Coast and Film Hub - is one hell of a blast to watch as the sky-flying chaos and hijinks of kites that kill plays out on the small screen. 

"one hell of a blast to watch as the sky-flying chaos and hijinks of kites that kill plays out on the small screen"


A killer kite?  Indeed.  This wild ass film is part Lynchian and part Corman as an old Nazi plot is uncovered by Abby (Manon Pages, Demigod, The Demonologist) when she comes into possession of a paper kite from her deceased grandmother.  She gives it to her adult brother (Charlie Early), who, once he discovers its secret nazi origins, is killed by it. 

Yes, you read that correctly.  If you aren’t into a whole lot of comedy mixed into your frothy horror, then this is not the movie for you.  But, if you are a 6-pack guzzling couch-crashing cinefile jonesing for more films like Evil Dead 2 and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, then . . . HOLD ONTO YOUR BUTTS

Watch this crazy flick.  Now.Killer Kites (2023)

Complete with its own theme song, Killer Kites flies onto the small screen with a dementia reserved only for Z-grade horror aficionados.  The acting is unpolished and so too are the effects as co-directors Alan Dale and Austin Frosch bring chaos to the friendly skies via a killer kite and a supernatural plot which is ONE STEP BEYOND the city limits of Twin Peaks.

Starring Manon Pages, Austin Naulty, Carter Simoneaux, Killer Kites and its worm farm psychosis is a swift kick to the seat of the pants thanks to its Nazi connections and its paper kite hilarity.  The film is absolutely BONKERS and everyone knows just what type of “horror” film they are starring in and it ABSOLUTELY works to create a bizarre film in which a stupid kite KILLS and KILLS again. 

To say more about this stone cold cult classic (which it is bound to be) would do it disservice.  This is a kind of stupidity which one must discover on their own to truly appreciate.  Thanks to the online buzz and demand created after its trailer debuted, Killer Kites has been bumped up from its late May release.  It is streaming RIGHT NOW

Can you stop this madness?  Can Abby?  Find out when you fly high with Killer Kites.

5/5 stars

Film Details

Killer Kites (2023)

MPAA Rating: Unrated.
Runtime:
72 mins
Director
: Paul Dale; Austin Frosch
Writer:
Austin Frosch
Cast:
Austin Naulty; Manon Pages; Carter Simoneaux
Genre
: Comedy | Horror
Tagline:
Not the scariest movie, but it's up there..
Memorable Movie Quote: "As of right now, there's no real connection between these deaths."
Distributor:
Film Hub
Official Site:
Release Date:
May 3, 2023
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date:

Synopsis: When Abby's grandma dies, the only thing she inherits a stupid kite - after giving it to her brother; he is mysteriously killed and the kite disappears. While searching for the truth, she is tangled in a strange supernatural plot, where this killer kite continues to kill! Now, Abby must string together a way to stop the kite before it blows us all away. Kites may not be the scariest monster ever, but they’re up there.

Art

Killer Kites (2023)