According to the National Missing and Unidentified Persons System, more than 600,000 people go missing in the United States each year. Most are recovered, but how many of those missing are left in the wild is unclear. This is where Something in the Woods comes into play as no one keeps track of that information.
Written by Deanna Gomez and directed by Alexander T. Hwang, Something in the Woods is both captivating and entrancing as we are slowly led into the woods where a wild creature dwells. Our first tease comes with the arrival of a dead, maggot-riddled body which is discovered by a hapless deputy who finds himself in the woods, looking for the owner of an abandoned vehicle on the highway.
What he discovers is that Something in the Woods is a killing machine . . . but that’s just one part of this horror entry.
The bigger story is that New York Times reporter, Nora Thompson ( (Nicole Cinaglia, Cold Blooded Killers, Hunting Lands) has become an overnight celebrity by exposing a corrupt senator’s illegal activities. As a result of the harmful exposé, the senator commits suicide, and his daughter, Carolyn (Vienna Hayden, How to Kill Your Roommates and Get Away with It, Horse Camp) - wanting to avenge her father - kidnaps Nora and takes her deep into the woods.
Thing is, there is something WILD in the woods already and it isn’t sharing the murder rates with Carolyn. Now, the two women must work together to stay alive and get clean away from SOMETHING IN THE WOODS.
Sure, there is a lot to criticize here: the acting, the combat choreography, the choppy editing, and so on. Yet, the narrative and the flow of this independently shot feature is both clever and satisfying as viewers get the opportunity to vilify the supposed heroine of the story and root for her demise only to take it all back when the monster in the woods - designed by Mark Lunn (Amityville in the Hood, 5G Zombies) - is revealed and the two women have to team up in order to survive.
Okay, so let’s talk about the creature in the woods. We get some POV shots as it spies on the girls, we get close-ups of its gnarly looking hands, and there is a steady build-up to its reveal. When it literally pops up, it is both unexpected and absolutely out of this world. The design is either going to make you laugh and give up on the movie or - if you pause it and see what I did - make you respect the influences. It’s quite well done and different from the usual creature designs out there. There’s quite a bit of Ray Harryhausen in the design and, as it looks damn practical, I loved seeing it come to life and grab at its victims.
Ultimately, pacing warts and all, Something in the Woods is a fun throwback film to the matinee monsters of yesteryear. There’s a couple of good scares and I honestly liked the creature design, proving to be both unique and captivating in its bizarreness.
SOMETHING IN THE WOODS, starring Nicole Cinaglia, will be released on digital and DVD September 6 from Uncork’d Entertainment.
MPAA Rating: Unrated.
Runtime: 76 mins
Director: Alexander T. Hwang
Writer: Deanna Gomez
Cast: Nicole Cinaglia; Robbie Dias; Vienna Hayden
Genre: Horror
Tagline: It's Hungry.
Memorable Movie Quote: " will not have you embarrass me."
Distributor: Uncork'd Entertainment
Official Site:
Release Date: September 6, 2022
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date: September 6, 2022.
Synopsis: Crazy woman kidnaps a reporter who she blames for the fall of her family and her lost inheritance. Dragging the reporter out into the woods, they find they both have to deal with "something". Nonsense ensues.
