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Scarecrows - Movie Review

Cornfields and the bloody effigies raised in them that strike large, looming shadows and cause the skies to fill with big, black crows are no joke.  Many a haunted tale has been heard concerning those creepy places.  And on camera?  Well, the same can be said of the creep factor seen in movies like Children of the Corn and Jeepers Creepers.  Hell, the atmosphere of it all begs for horror.

Which is why a movie like Scarecrows, in which trespassing teens find themselves strung up in potato sacks and mounted on wooden crosses, can be so terrifying. After all, there’s always room for more and more scarecrows. . . 

. . . and out in the sticks, where there are endless rows of corn, no one can here you scream.

Especially if they are on the receiving end of a blowjob. Wait. What?! 

"works far more often than it doesn’t thanks to a very spirited vibe and some great practical effects"

Scarecrows, directed by Stu Stone (who played Ronald Fisher in Donnie Darko!!), is a horror movie with one foot in the grave and the other consistently tickling our funny bone.  The film gets right what so many horror titles released in the 1990s, which it can easily be compared to, got wrong as it strikes a good balance between an amusing situation and the horror that seems sewn straight into ANY cornfield. 

Ely (Umid Amin) and Farbsie (Mike Taylor) just want to go a rumored nearby lagoon.  They’ve got two hot chicks with them, Ash (Hannah Gordon) and Devon (Maaor Ziv), who aren’t as excited for the skinny dipping due to the trek through the rows and rows of cornfields surrounding the aquatic paradise, but they are game for whatever sex games go on. {googleads}

But Ely wants to muck up the afternoon by proposing to Ash.  Farbsie is having none of it, though.  He wants Ely to experience college and all the ladies willing to drop on their knees in front of him (because blowjobs are really important to him) while being free of commitment. 

And what better way is there to demonstrate this then by getting two hot chicks to strip down and swim with them?  So what it if it involves trespassing?!?!?!

We already know something horrible is lurking in the cornfield.  We already know one scarecrow is actually a human.  The crows, picking off thumbs and fingers, do, too.  Yum!  The jokes made with the teens discover the missing digits – one lands on the car before they leave it for the long hike – are funny.  The danger they are in just doesn’t resonate. 

And these interloping hooligans will pay for it with their lives.  The creepy dude with big ass black hat (Jason J. Thomas) will make sure of it: these are HIS fields and he will do with whomever he discovers in them as he sees fit. Scarecrows - Movie Review

Brutal and funny, Scarecrows gets most of its laughs in early on.  Sure, there’s sexy time in between the rows of corn as Devon makes the move on the already spoken for Ely (because she can) AFTER the injuries start rolling in, but the film never completely goes dark with the horror until the very end.  Sewing mouths shut?  OUCH.  The low budget film, shot in Canada, works far more often than it doesn’t thanks to a very spirited vibe and some great practical effects.  Horror hounds will be pleased with the gritty look of the violence; there is not one single instance of CGI.    

Scarecrows, written by Adam Rodness and Stone, is 80-minutes of nasty fun!  It is now streaming on all digital platforms. 

3 stars


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Scarecrows - Movie Review

MPAA Rating: Unrated.
80 mins
: Stuart Stone
Adam Rodness, Stuart Stone
Hannah Gordon, Mike Taylor, Umed Amin
: Horror
It was supposed to be the summer of their dreams.
Memorable Movie Quote: "The scarecrows. They're alive."
Theatrical Distributor:
Uncork’d Entertainment
Official Site:
Release Date:
VOD December 11, 2018
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date:
No details available.
Synopsis: While on a hike to find a secret lagoon, a group of friends have no choice but to pass through an ominous cornfield. Unbeknownst to them, the farm owner despises trespassers and has vowed to kill anyone who crosses his land by turning them into living scarecrows, leaving them to rot in his fields. Once one goes up... it never comes down.


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Scarecrows - Movie Review


Blu-ray Details:

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Scarecrows - Movie Review