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Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987) - Blu-ray Review

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Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987) - Blu-ray Review

“Isn’t it gorgeous, babe?!”  That’s the pervading sentiment in Hard Ticket to Hawaii, a bleach-blonde action flick in which hot babes do their best thinking in Jacuzzis and, after insulting a bunch of horny men, start kicking lots of ass. 

Directed by the one and only Andy Sidaris, who previously wowed B-movie enthusiasts with Malibu Express, his second similarly-styled film, Hard Ticket to Hawaii, serves as the blueprint he would continue to follow for years and years to come.  It is with this hilariously awful film, in which a skateboarding hooligan is blown sky-high thanks to a bazooka, in which he tweaks his formula to include babes as the headlining act, is probably his best known and best received trashterpiece of schlock entertainment. 

"Full of over-the-top action sequences and a snake who busts through a toilet, Hard Ticket to Hawaii will make sure that you are definitely not bored on a Tuesday night."

And, shockingly enough, thanks to a new partnership with Mill Creek Entertainment, Sidaris launches its HD debut alongside Malibu Express on blu-ray with brand-new 4K restorations. 

Starring Dona Speir (Miss March 1984) and Hope Marie Carlton (Miss July 1985), Hard Ticket to Hawaii, full of some amazing scenery (of the topless sort, ya know) eventually tells the story of two undercover drug enforcement officers who accidentally get in the middle of a diamond shipment which pisses off a drug lord (Rodrigo Obregón in a role that is all too overacted) and one hell of a wildly mutated snake. {googleads}

The drug lord wants his merchandise back.  For good reason, too.  Unfortunately, with that pesky mutated snake roaming around the jungle (killing photographers and models alike), it turns out there are very few people these two babes, who love to run around in bikinis and talk spy flicks, can trust to help them out the tangled jam they wind up in. Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987) - Blu-ray Review

And so, with high-flying kicks and one-in-a-million bullets to the face, the two women forge a path through Hawaii that is full of hilariously awful dialogue and men named Jimmy John.  And then shit starts exploding left and right thanks to the hilarious hijinks of Ronn Moss as Rowdy Abilene and his deadly knack of blowing shit up.

Want a laugh?  Sit down for this wild ride, then.  Full of over-the-top action sequences and a snake who busts through a toilet, Hard Ticket to Hawaii, complete with a laser-brained theme song, a crossdressing killer, and an inflatable-carrying assassin will make sure that you are definitely not bored on a Tuesday night.

Make it a Hard Ticket to Hawaii night.  Because a healthy body and mind are very important!

5/5 beers

Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987) - Blu-ray Review

MPAA Rating: R.
96 mins
: Andy Sidaris
Andy Sidaris
Ronn Moss, Dona Speir, Hope Marie Carlton
: Action
To get to PARADISE, they'll have to go through HELL!
Memorable Movie Quote: "Look at you two... Every shot, a postcard! I'm gonna give you the best seat in the house!"
Theatrical Distributor:
Malibu Bay Films
Official Site:
Release Date:
March 1987
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date:
April 16, 2019
Synopsis: A Hawaiian drug kingpin plans to flood the islands with narcotics all financed by illegal diamond shipments to his private retreat. When his henchmen kill two DEA agents who were trying to stop the drug lord, the Agency sends in two of its best agents to break up the drug ring and take out the leader.


Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987) - Blu-ray Review


Blu-ray Details:

Home Video Distributor: Mill Creek Entertainment
Available on Blu-ray
- March 1987
Screen Formats: 1.85:1
: English SDH
English: DTS-HD Master Audio 2.0
Discs: Blu-ray Disc; single disc; digital copy
Region Encoding: Locked to Region A

Mill Creek Entertainment finally brings the good with this campy title.  Presented in a crisp 1080p transfer, the new 4k scan of the original negative is a thing of pristine beauty.  The film is dominated with reds and greens that absolutely burst with color.  It’s a cheap film, for sure, but the simple backgrounds burst with new details and a nice level of clarity.  Black levels are solid and skin tones are natural.  Shadows are defined and the film has a new depth previously unseen.  Audio wise, the DTS-HD MA 2.0 mono soundtrack is clear and the dialogue is never lost or hard to hear.



  • Director Andy Sidaris and his wife Arlene give fans the commentary they deserve.  Hilarious and over the top, this one is definitely for fans of the movie!

Special Features:

Mill Creek and Andy Sidaris give fans a treat with this release.  Fans get old-school trailers, a vintage making-of featurette, a commentary track, and a digital copy code.  There is also a newly-filmed introduction with Andy Sidaris and Julie Strain.

  • Intro (1 min)
  • Behind the Scenes (36 min)
  • Malibu Bay Trailers


Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987) - Blu-ray Review

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