BADass SINema Unearthed - Blu-ray Review

Cherry Falls (2000) - Blu-ray Review

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Cheery Falls (2000) - Blu-ray Review

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4 beersCherry Falls.  It is an idyllic small town in Virginia.  Tall trees and large pools of water surround it.  Nothing much happens here, mind you, but its residents love the safety and security it provides.  It is a place to raise a family; almost isolated from the rest of the state.  And the kids here, well, they are some of the most wholesome teens in the world…

…until the day their parents start pressuring them to lose their virginity.  Lose it or die!!!

Wait, what?!

Flipping the whole slasher script on its proverbial head, Cherry Falls is the horror genre’s best-kept secret.  It is an intelligent romp through a new teenage wasteland where a knife-wielding murderer is offing the small town’s virgins one by one because of a nasty little secret from the town’s past.  It stars the late Brittany Murphy, comedian Jay Mohr, and The Terminator’s own Michael Biehn as the town’s sheriff.  Featuring Gabriel Mann, DJ Qualls, and Candy Clark, the film is a solid mix of young and old talent that does not disappoint.

Satirical and cleverly-written, Cherry Falls is hands-down one the BEST horror scripts to come out of the past three decades of filmmaking.  Writer Ken Selden tops Heathers at its own game with this one.  Unfortunately, it is a movie at war with itself (due to production delays), some state senators (due to America’s conscious shift to the right in our violent, sex-driven entertainment), and its director Geoffrey Wright, who watched censors have their way with his movie.

Scream Factory proudly releases Cherry Falls on blu-ray with much fanfare but – as no one can shake it loose from the steely grip of USA Films – the original uncut copy of the movie remains locked up.  This release is the censored version originally seen on USA when Cherry Falls found itself without theatrical distribution here in the United States and was shown on television instead, making it the most expensive television movie ever.

This is a film full of irony and, with many smart scenes, there’s a tragedy to it because so many people never got a chance to see it.  And then there’s the whole push and pull of the momentum in its churn.  It’s not smooth like butter.  Several moments are seriously great and then…and then…there’s a moment that breaks the flow.  I can’t tell if some of the choppiness to the movie is due to its abysmal and unfair censoring or the director, who approached this flick as if it were Vertigo, and was wont to never give in to other opinions.

Regardless, Cherry Falls deserves an audience and any fan of satire and of slasher flicks will appreciate the hell out of this one.    Go ahead, pop that cherry…everyone else is.

Cheery Falls (2000) - Blu-ray Review

MPAA Rating: R for strong violence/gore, teen sexuality, language and some drug content
Runtime:
92 mins
Director
: Geoffrey Wright
Writer:
Ken Selden
Cast:
Brittany Murphy, Jay Mohr, Michael Biehn
Genre
: Drama | Horror
Tagline:
Get Laid... Or Die!
Memorable Movie Quote: "She thinks fellatio is a character in Shakespeare."
Distributor:
Shout Factory
Official Site:
Release Date:
No theatrical release
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date:
March 29, 2016
Synopsis: In the small town of Cherry Falls a psychotic murderer is killing off the virgins of the local high school.

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